Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Strange and unusual punishment

Two of our favourite footballers have escaped the death penalty this week.

First, Wayne Rooney was spared electrocution, referee Mark Clattenburg deciding instead that a free-kick in the centre-circle was adequate punishment for elbowing Wigan's James McCarthy.

In an unrelated incident, Ashley Cole was fined two weeks wages for shooting a student, rather than being killed, an option his manager Carlo 'Porkbelly' Ancelotti apparently considered but decided against.

The two heroes meet tonight in the Premiership, chastened by the experience of coming so close to summary execution.